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发表于 2019-7-28 01:37:54 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式

曾经【作者文集】【作者资料】共计1895字
  
  
  曾经
  ——伤逝冷樱
  
  
  “当樱花放肆颓败的时候,我相信,你能看到我的影子,我也能看到你的笑容……”我是一个不信诺言的人,我笑了。笑得是那么冷漠,是绝望,是黯然。
  认识扬,是因为我是一个优等生,而他,是老师的一个头疼“问题”。于是,两个极限碰到一起,一张桌子也不知当时怎么容得下?扬出生在富豪之家,也可以说是书香门第。我去过他家,一切都是金色的,闪烁得让人不知所措。可我一进他的房间,就如同进入另一个世界,全是蓝色,像一片海,是他的名字。蓝色和金色在色相环中是一种强烈对比,我似乎看见了他搬家时倔强的表情。
  跟他同桌,对于身为假小子的我来说,天天都是“世界大战”,可班主任迫与我孤傲的成绩和扬父母的权势,从不过问。实话说,我不是一个好学生,如果没有名列前茅的成绩,也许老师昔日的和蔼会成为冷笑和唾骂。和扬在一起,我的本性会一点点暴露无疑,因为他的单纯,他的放肆,他的顽皮,以及我的笑声充填了我那个时期所有空间。
  我们都爱樱花,虽然我喜欢的是樱花绽放时的倾白癜风的治疗药物国倾城,而他喜欢的是樱花伤逝时的一地凄凉。在一次次接触中,我感觉到他表面的大度,不羁,野性难驯只不过是一种伪装,伪装着他内心害怕孤独,脆弱的一面。我喜欢甚至习惯和他斗嘴。记忆犹新,一次斗嘴,我的霸道斗不过他的理直气壮,从小到大,从来没有人限制过我的骄傲和独权,所以又气又恼,差一点“下雨”了。于是我开始捉弄傻气的他,一个上午没理他。上课一改往日作风,“专心”听讲,好几次他踢我脚,我都当作没感觉。我心里偷着乐,暗暗地想:扬啊扬,你真傻得可爱。可爱得如幼童般天真,你真是个单纯的孩子。到了下午第二节课,他就忍不住了,寂寞开始啃噬他的心灵。小心翼翼地问我:
  “你怎么不理我?生气啦?”
  我看着扬的一脸无辜,终于的大声宣泄内心的愉悦——哈哈大笑着,他的眼神更加疑惑,显得“楚楚可怜”,于是一直一直问我:“怎么啦?你笑什么?快说呀!”我突然停住了笑,我看着扬的眼睛:不大,却异常晶莹透明,戴着眼镜,却不无神。睫毛不长,却很上扬,让人感到很长,柔软,仿佛狗尾巴草上的毛。好多时候,总是错觉,扬的眼睛是蓝的,那种诡秘,深邃的蓝色,公益中科大海深处的蓝色。他的眼睛里有我隐隐约约同样泛着光,诡秘的瞳仁……一脸茫然的他在我俩沉默好久之后,在空气凝结之后,突然莫名其妙地说:“我长青春痘了吗?”我一愣,于是豪爽的笑声又在教室上空弥漫……
  有一阶段,我们开始实行“互补政策”,我帮他补习各种作业,而他教我打羽毛球。理由很简单:在各科群英中,我是长开不败的“霸王花”,而在学校体坛中,他是笑傲江湖的“难逢敌手”。
  说好,星期六下午,场,扬教我打羽毛球,哪天,天空很干净,零零总总撒了些柔软的碎云,仿佛神话中,魔咒解开的那一天。趁他没来,我去文学社看报纸,一看屁股就粘住了椅子,入迷了。一梦出醒,瞧手表早已显示2:56。我急忙跑去场。一看,空空如也。难道他没来?难道他忘了?他是不守信用的人吗?……我的心开始空了,像在下雨。冰凉从脚低一点一点漫上来。我失魂落魄,跌跌撞撞地坐在一棵树下,手紧紧抱住膝盖。心茫然了,这不仅仅只是失望……不知过了多久,一个熟悉的身影已经悄悄出现在我身后,使劲拍我的肩膀,大叫:“你去哪了?吓死我了!你知不知道我等了你一下午啊!”随着粗粗的喘气声。我望着他:双手扶着膝盖,躬着背。手不时在额上来来回回,几滴细小的汗珠沾在两鬓,有点愤怒,又有点温柔地望着我。我望着他,恍如隔世;我望着他,感觉心在不断跳跃,渐渐从冰封开始温暖;我望着他,眼眶微微有一层水汽,有点朦胧……我一下子跳了起来,我已经分不清这是的感受是激动,还是喜悦,甚至喜极而泣。他,扬,仍然是一副“无所谓,累死我了,好担心”的表情,眼里依旧闪着熟悉的晶莹蓝色。我呆呆中科白癜风医院让天下无白地,我想在我幼小的心灵中,再也不会忘记这样的笑容,这样的深蓝了:上扬的睫毛,邪气的笑容……
  初中分班,我考入了实验学校,他上了一所平凡的中学,相隔两地。我们都有QQ,QQ上都有对方的名字,可是我们是两个世界的北京最好的治疗白癜风的医院人。形同陌路,陌路形同。那是一种如何复杂的感情啊,因为我们都是倔强的孩子,所以,分开时他对我说了开头那句话。
  我想我会把这段曾经尘封在记忆最深处,让时间这场从不间断的大雨慢慢冲淡他,直至流下永恒的淡香与薄薄灰尘。当有一天,樱花又开始绝望,放肆地伤逝,我会打开记忆的匣子,想起曾经有一个单纯,顽皮的男孩把我带入了懵懂,敏感的世界。纷飞的逝樱,上扬的睫毛,邪气的笑容,模糊的轮廓,那时,我想我可以笑着潸然泪下,记忆的清泪从眼里,从心里幸福地流下来,流下来……
    
    
  
  
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发表于 2019-7-28 02:58:43 | 显示全部楼层

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